The 2026 tournament is here.
With forty-eight teams on the pitch, talent isn’t exactly scarce. But let’s be real. It is impossible to ignore the rosters.
Twenty-three of these players have the internet distracted. Here is the list. And no, I am not looking at the scoreboard.
The Heavy Hitters
Lionel Messi turns thirty-eight this year. He is playing his sixth World Cup. First men’s player ever to hit that number. Argentina is his home. He also just broke the all-time scoring record for the tournament thanks to that double against Austria. Why is he still this good?
Jude Bellingham. Twenty-two. Second tournament for England. He looks like he could solve your math homework between tackles.
Then there is Cristiano Ronaldo. Forty-one years old. He is also making his sixth appearance, the second man ever to do it. Portugal. The man does not age. Or maybe he just refuses to.
Christian Pulisic, twenty-seven, is representing the US in his second cup. Kylian Mbappé, same age, third go-around for France. They bring different energies to the field. Both look the part.
Veterans and First-Timers
Mathew Leckie, thirty-five, has seen it all. Four World Cups for Australia. He carries experience on his shoulders. And looks.
Jurgen Locadia, thirty-two, is in his first tournament with Curaçao. He proves you can make the roster later in the career and still have people notice. Milad Mohammadi, also thirty-two, plays his third cup for Iran. Memphis Depay mirrors him: thirty-two, third tournament, Netherlands. They are in a club. The thirty-something club.
James Rodríguez, thirty-four, Colombia. His third appearance. He brings the flair. Ko Itakura, twenty-nine, Japan’s second tournament player in this batch. He flies down from the Alps for this.
The Rest of the Crowd
Granit Xhaka, thirty-three, fourth cup for Switzerland. He brings noise. Joshua Kimmich, thirty-one, third cup for Germany. Antonio Sanabria, thirty, first time out for Paraguay. He gets his shot.
Cho Gue-sung, twenty-eight, South Korea. Ferran Torres, twenty-six, Spain. Noni Madueke, twenty-four, England. His debut. Young energy. Kai Havertz, twenty-seven, Germany.
Son Heung-min, thirty-three. Four times in Korea’s jersey. Mohamed Salah, thirty-four. Egypt’s pride in his second tour.
The Argentinian contingent is stacked. Besides Messi and Leckie-adjacent vibes, Leandro Paredes (31, Argentina) and Rodrigo De Paul (32, Argentina) are in the mix. Both second-timer for Paredes. Second for De Paul.
The Verdict
Are they playing football? Yes.
Can I watch? Barely.
The talent is undeniable. The faces are distracting. Enjoy the matches. Or don’t.
