You want to spoil her. You want this gesture to carry the weight of “I’m totally in love with you.” It’s not about the price tag. Big, shiny objects rarely satisfy that specific thirst for special connection. Flowers? Okay, chocolate? standard. Spa day? It’s good for stress, but it’s not necessarily good for your soul.
Try this.
Give her today what no other girl in your life got except because you love her. The goal is uniqueness. The indicator is emotional resonance.
The psychology of personal gifts
says Dr. Martha Dupechere, Psychotherapist in Washington, DC. No need to empty your bank account with gifts. It is necessary to hit an emotional cord.
“We all want to feel special,” Dupecher says. “One way to say it is a thoughtful gift that says, ‘I know how to please you.’
There is one main rule here. Do not give yourself a gift and call it hers. If you want sexy underwear, buy it for yourself. Do not put it in her box. She wants to feel known, not managed.
Why Sentiment Beats Swanky
Kristine Dang, executive vice president of merchandising and design at RedEnvelope.com, confirmed what many of us suspected. Women don’t want expensive gadgets and or appliances as romantic gestures. We want something that moves us. Something personal. Things we would never buy ourselves.
The best gift is the one that says, \”
RedEnvelope.com’s popular products reflect this. Think pearl “xoxo” bracelets. “IOU a table for two” series. These include stainless steel salt and pepper shakers and postcards. He writes down his favorite restaurants and dates. you come to the place Or an oriental pink lilies in a earthenware vase. pink. Apparently, this is the color of love.
But you don’t need a retailer. It takes creativity. Tomima Edmark, author of 365 Romantic Gifts for Your Love, suggests simple, personalized options that cost next to nothing and mean everything.
The art of handmade gestures
Mix and match to make the gift special. Take something classic and break it up.
Flowers. Don’t just give her a bouquet of flowers. Place them around your home. Attach a love letter to each stem. Send her on a floral scavenger hunt. Make her work for the romance.
Chocolate. Skip the mystery fillings. Buy a specific kind she loves. Bonus points if you had to travel to find them.
Spa Treatment. If you want a massage, do it together. Side-by-side. Double the pleasure.
If you’re stuck, here are three concrete ideas from Edmark’s work.
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The Homemade Horoscope. Will he win and get to eat at his favorite place? Or does he keep the kids busy outside all weekend? Write down the nice things you are going to do for him this month. This is a promise. This is the plan.
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** Something to Write Home About.**Personal stationery. Use your pet’s name. Include fun facts about your date. He doesn’t write letters to his great aunt in Miami for the “Snaggle Bunny” magazine. But now you have a notepad to write love notes to each other. It becomes a secret language.
-**More fun than food. ** Send him to work with a vintage kids lunch box. Did he ever love The Fonzi? Pack your party favors. He remembers the joys of his childhood. Make him smile at his desk.
Don’t forget the men
Ladies, your man likes a thoughtful gift too. They cannot escape the power of carefully chosen items. Think creatively about what makes him happy.
And buy him tickets to those sporting events. Or power tools.
Are you feeling very selfless? Shop for sexy lingerie that will turn her on every time.
If you want more ideas, we have a bookshelf full of them. *The Gift: An A-Z Reference Guide to Solving Gift-Giving Problems… Forever! Robin Friedman Spizman and Liya Lev Ertel 52 Romantic Nights… to spice up your love life.
But really, the best gifts are the ones you give with all your heart. All that’s left is the packaging.
